Moving through it
My wife died at home, some 27 months ago. Although on the surface we're "amazing" (my 2 daughters 20, 16 and I), on reality we're all sad, lonely and (dare I say it) depressed... and it still sucks. It doesn't really get any easier, you just get more familiar with a foreign life, the new normal... and reflect on wtf just happened. The girls and I are really connected, open and purposely vulnerable, but we miss mum. All I can say to anyone who still has the good fortune of having them, no matter what state, or how painful, share the intimacy of death with your loved one, no emotional barricades, baggage or walls of protection, just presence, truth and being. In the end, we just wished she would die, it wasn't mum any more, and the next morning, she was gone. This was nearly a 'when cancer won't go away' topic , because it's always there! Always.